I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Randomize
