Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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