hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I will die if light touches me.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
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