I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
