If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
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