Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize