I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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