question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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