This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Randomize
