I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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