I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
do nipples grow back?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize