I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
