I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Randomize