You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
