You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
