also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
She even gives head with a lisp.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong