drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Randomize
