SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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