Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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