meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
