But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
so let's talk penis.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
