Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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