Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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