turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
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