Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
