Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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