So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
