You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize