Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
You Will Never Meet Anyone More Annoying Than These 23 People
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
These 23 People Prove You Don’t Have To Be A 10 To Be Good In Bed
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
you are never too drunk for berry picking
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"