I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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