The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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