Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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