I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
