Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize