I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
i just had sex bonerless
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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