I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
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