dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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