I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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