Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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