i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
