Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
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