some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
