hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Randomize
