dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i think i have herpe
just one?
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I can't put those talents on a resume
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
