Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
