Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
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