Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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