do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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