I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
