one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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