Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
